Let's Take a Day
by Qweb
Summary: The day of the Battle of Manhattan was full of drama and danger. The day after was no picnic either...or what happened when Tony Stark woke up with two assassins sitting on his bed. A Very Good Team-fic.
1. The Day After

_The day of the Battle of Manhattan was full of drama and danger. The day after was no picnic either. Or what happened when Tony Stark woke up with two assassins sitting on his bed. A Very Good Team-fic.  
I'm assuming there were a couple of days between the end of the battle and Thor taking Loki home. _

**Let's Take a Day**

**Chapter 1: The Day After**

"Wakey, wakey."

When bruised and battered Tony Stark woke up from exhausted sleep late the morning after the Battle of Manhattan, there was a master assassin sitting on either side of his bed.

He started violently, one hand coming up to cover the arc reactor as if that could still the rapid beating of his heart.

"Geez! Scare a hero to death"

Two well-matched smirks greeted him.

"How did you get in here anyway?" he demanded.

They ignored his question. It suited Natasha's air of mystery to not tell him that Pepper had let them in when she found out about their mission.

"Time to get up, Stark. There's something you need to see," she said. "Jarvis?"

"Of course, Agent Romanoff," the artificial intelligence's voice responded.

Tony muttered, "Traitor," as the big screen came on with a four-way split screen showing news broadcasts and websites. Tony stopped wondering how Natasha had gained the cooperation of Jarvis when his mind registered the images.

"Son of a bitch!"

Multiple images showed a raging Hulk with an inset photo of Bruce Banner looking his most scruffy and disreputable. General Thaddeus Ross appeared, distinguished and forthright, with his medals gleaming. He spoke seriously, detailing the crimes of Bruce Banner, alias The Hulk.

"Jarvis, can we squash this?"

"It's too late, Stark," Natasha said. "It's everywhere."

"I'm afraid Agent Romanoff is right, sir."

"How could SHIELD let this happen?" Tony demanded, feeling guilty that he'd let it happen.

"It's not your fault," Natasha said, accurately reading her former employer. "It's not SHIELD's fault, either."

"They're still digging out the New Mexico base," Clint said grimly. His eyes were focused on something Tony couldn't see. "The helicarrier is in drydock. The New York headquarters has a space whale on top of it and so many of our best agents are injured or … dead." He swallowed hard and hung his head.

They all thought of Coulson for a moment. He wouldn't have allowed this attack on Banner, but he was gone.

Tony thumped Clint's knee. "Not your fault, Featherhead. It's all on Loki. You saved millions yesterday. Don't forget it."

"What he said." Natasha punched Clint in the arm hard enough to make him wince and rub it, hard enough to break him out of his funk, at least momentarily.

"All right, let's see what kind of damage control we can do. I've got a couple of ideas percolating, but first I need a hot tub." Moving stiffly, Tony started to throw the covers aside, warning Natasha he hadn't put any "PJs" on the night before.

"Please, Stark," she said. "You don't have anything I haven't seen before," the spy scoffed.

He tapped the arc reactor in his chest by way of response. She just smiled. "I was your assistant, remember. I've seen that, too."

Clint climbed off the bed, wincing at the pain in his back. He'd had the benefit of SHIELD medical treatment and a Romanoff back massage, but he was far from his normal agile self.

"You look as bad as I feel," Tony said frankly, while he gingerly levered himself off the bed.

"Crashing through a window will do that to you," Clint replied.

"Tell me about it!" Tony answered. The two men shared a grin. Clint's was weak, but it was genuine.

"You're welcome to join me in the hot tub. You too, Romanoff," Tony said, doing the Groucho Marx thing with his eyebrows.

* * *

Turned out the spies weren't at all shy about joining him au natural in the hot tub. But Tony knew better than to ogle Natasha. He wanted to keep all his parts intact. Tony relaxed as the hot water loosened his sore muscles.

"Now if we just had the rest of the team. A little science talk for the mind and some nice beefcake for the eyes."

The agents chuckled. "I'm not sure Rogers would be up for the nudity," Natasha said.

"You might be surprised," said Clint, a former Army sniper. "There's not much privacy in the army. And a war zone is even worse."

"But I doubt he's ready for Romanoff," Tony answered.

"Cap is an officer and a gentleman," Natasha said. "There aren't many left in the world. I wouldn't want to spoil it."

Pepper came in with a tray of food that she passed around. She sat beside the hot tub dangling her bare feet in the water and told Jarvis to put Channel 12 on the main screen.

* * *

The newswoman stood with her back to the clean up, talking earnestly into her camera.

"It's the day after what's being called the Battle of Manhattan and clean up efforts are already underway," she said. "You can see the black vans of a secretive agency called SHIELD collecting the alien weapons." A caped figure swooped by overhead then landed alongside a blue-garbed man who was heaving dead aliens into a dump truck. "There goes Thor, who some call a Norse god and some call a friendly alien, and with him is Captain America. Both men are working to repair the mess created by their battle, but where is Iron Man? There's been no sign of the self-proclaimed hero. Just because he's a billionaire — does that mean he's too good to clean up his own messes?"

A startled gesture by her cameraman was the only warning the newswoman got before a steely voice spoke politely behind her.

"Excuse me, ma'am. I couldn't help but hear what you said," Captain America told her.

He'd been a full block away, and yet he'd heard her over the heavy machinery.

The cameraman started to put down his camera, but Cap gave him a stern look and he began filming again.

"You are doing Mr. Stark an injustice," Cap continued. "He would be here if he could, but you have to remember, there is a man inside that iron suit. He got plenty beat up in that battle and he doesn't heal up as fast as Thor and I do. He could hardly walk last night. Would you ask a man who's been in a car accident to jump out of bed and pick up the broken glass? Stark saved the entire city from a nuclear missile. I think he earned a day to recuperate. You look for him tomorrow and I bet you'll see him. Nice talking to you, I've got to get back to work now." He gave the speechless woman a small salute, then trotted back to Thor.

The woman swallowed, plastered her smile back on her face and spoke to the camera again. "There you heard it from Captain America himself. Tony Stark was injured during the battle but once his wounds are treated, he will be back to help with the clean up. And now back to the studio."

* * *

"The defender of liberty is defending me?" Tony was incredulous. "Turn it off, J," he ordered.

"So, has the genius percolated, yet?" Clint asked.

"Coffee's done," Tony announced. He climbed unashamedly out of the tub, but meekly wrapped a towel around his waist when Pepper held it out sternly.

"What are you going to do," Pepper asked curiously. Fight fire with fire?"

"No, I'm going to fight PR with PR," Tony said with determination.

**To be continued**


	2. Fluffy

_In A Very Good Team, Chapter 38, American Pastime, the Avengers play a game of baseball for charity (and to let baseball lover Steve play for the first time in his life). In that story, Bruce mentions that he doesn't have to hide his identity. This story tells why._

**Chapter 2: Fluffy**

Tony climbed out of the Jacuzzi in "A" Tower and did some stretches. A double dose of ibuprofen and a steaming hot bath were the prescription he'd needed to get back on his feet — but he was still hobbling like a man born in 1922 (Steve Rogers aside).

"That was nice of the captain to stick up for you," Pepper said, as she offered Tony a glass of orange juice.

"Yes," Tony groaned theatrically. "But it means I can't go back to bed or I'll make a liar out of an American icon."

Pepper gave a ladylike snort. "As if Jarvis hasn't been putting together a new suit all night."

Tony gave her an "I can't fool you, can I?" grin.

"And what will you two be doing while the rest of us are working?" Tony asked the two spies still lounging in the hot tub.

"We're spies," Natasha pointed out. "We supply intel. It's up to you to act on it."

Tony wanted to protest. If he had to work, they had to work.

Clint laughed at him. "Relax, Stark. We'll be joining the cleanup as anonymous SHIELD agents. You get to be the face of the Avengers."

"God help us," Natasha muttered loud enough for everyone to hear. Pepper giggled.

Tony put his nose in the air and hobbled to the flight deck. When he was suited up, he picked up a steamer-trunk-sized cooler under one arm and a massive Thermos jug under the other, then lifted off.

* * *

Tony had to set down in a cleared area, not too close to where his fellow Avengers were clearing some unstable rubble. He flipped up his visor and called. "Hey, boys and girls. I brought lunch."

"Food! Excellent!" Thor exclaimed, coming instantly. He wiped dirt from his face with his brawny arm. "This is thirsty work."

Tony smiled at the broad hint. "Sorry, blondie. Heavy lifting and ale don't mix. We can raid the bar after work," he promised. "Try this." Tony handed him a refillable bottle. "We call it iced tea. It has more flavor than plain water."

Thor quaffed it down in one gulp. He raised the bottle high, looked at the rubble all around him and smiled sheepishly at himself. He handed the bottle back to Tony. "May I have another, please?"

"Sure." Tony showed him how to refill the container from the huge Thermos jug.

Cap finished loading a carcass into a dump truck, then joined his comrades.

"Captain," Tony said.

"Mr. Stark," Cap answered. Their greetings were formal, but their smiles were warm.

"I see you went back to the thrilling days of yesteryear," Tony said, indicating the cowl on Cap's uniform. "Millions have already seen your face, you know."

Steve smiled at the Lone Ranger reference. "But how many will remember?" he asked. "Anyway, it was too late to get alterations on the uniform. All the tailors had other things on their minds. Have you got one of those for me?" Cap added wistfully, pointing at the tea.

Tony handed Steve a bottle.

Before Steve could even thank him, the reporting crew ran up.

"Mr. Stark! Can you give us a statement?"

It was second nature for Tony to hide any weakness from the barracudas that circled him — reporters, competitors, board members. The camera-loving philanthropist actually looked away from the lens, but a firm hand on his shoulder kept him from turning.

"Don't hide," Cap said.

How had Rogers come to know Stark so well in such a short time? But then, Cap had spent a fair amount of time on stage himself.

With a miniscule nod to Cap, Tony turned his patented 100-watt-equivalent smile on the reporter, while the camera relentlessly recorded every detail. The cut on his face had become a dark scar with two obvious stitches surrounded by an extensive purple bruise. It made the left side of his face look like a mask.

"That looks very painful," the reporter said sympathetically.

"You should see the other guys," Steve joked, tilting his head toward the cleanup.

"And you, my friend. Are you well?" Thor asked. "I think you still feel the effects of the energy blast." He poked Steve in the side.

Cap flinched away. "Ow! Thor!"

"Captain, were you injured, too?" the reporter asked.

"None of us escaped unscathed, ma'am," he answered, giving Thor a dirty look. "The skin's a little tender, but I'm mostly healed already."

"You heal quickly? Are the rumors true, then? You're the original Captain America?" She was a better reporter than Tony had realized.

Steve handled it well. "Didn't he fight in World War II?" the young-seeming man asked with an ironic twist to his mouth. It wasn't a lie, but it implied she was being ridiculous.

"Right. Silly," she agreed.

Thor regarded Cap with a frown. "Did you not …?"

"Didn't they tell you not to talk to the camera?" Tony interrupted.

"I'm not talking to the camera. I am talking to the captain," Thor answered warily.

Steve would have face-palmed, but he fully understood Thor's confusion. He explained that the camera was watching.

"It spies upon us?" Thor growled. His hand went to Mjolnir's hilt.

The cameraman backed away hastily. Tony and Steve moved between Thor and his intended victim.

"See, the red light means the camera is listening," Cap said quickly. "The man didn't realize you didn't understand that. He won't do it again."

"No, sir, I'm sorry. Honest."

Thor took the apology as graciously as a prince of Asgard should. "Forgive me, friend. I am not used to your ways."

Tony wrested back control of the conversation. "Listen, Melodye — it's Melodye, right?"

"Yes, sir." Wow, Tony Stark knew her name.

"How about I trade you some sandwiches for a few moments of privacy with my boys," Tony bartered.

Melodye looked at the begging-puppy eyes of her cameraman and soundman. They'd been out here for hours and knew if they left to get something to eat, they'd never get back inside the police lines.

"All right. It's a bargain," the reporter said, offering her hand to shake.

"Square deal. And don't go away. I might have something else for you later." Tony gave the crew food and wet wipes and chased them away.

The crew went out of earshot and set down their equipment pointedly aiming it away from the Avengers. Tony gave them a nod but reminded Jarvis to keep an eye on them.

"Of course, sir."

Bruce was putting his first aid skills to use, treating cuts and scrapes and burns.

"Hey, Bruce, Tony brought food," Cap called.

"Be with you in a moment," Bruce called back. He sat on a broken block of concrete, cleaning an acid burn on the arm of one of the workmen.

Tony pulled out a tube of sanitizing cloths. "Here, use these to clean up," he instructed, showing the two men how to use them. "You don't want to eat with Chitauri guts on your hands. You don't know where those things have been."

Thor and Cap agreed and cleaned their hands carefully before digging into the supersize sandwiches that Pepper had made for the Avengers.

"What about the others?" Cap asked, indicating the workmen and first responders.

"Catering truck is on its way," Tony replied. "Cancel that. It's here."

The food truck pulled up and the staff began to set up to feed everyone. Steve saw a logo on the rear of the truck. It read, "A division of Stark Industries." He hid his smile by taking a big bite out of his foot-long sub sandwich.

While the two men ate, Tony said, "Listen, before the news guys get back. Ross outed Bruce."

Thor looked grave.

"Was that English?" Cap asked curiously.

"I suppose 'out' was merely a preposition when you were young," Tony snarked.

"It means to reveal a person's secrets in public," Thor explained to Cap. The All Speak understood slang just fine, references were another story. "But who is this 'Ross'?" the thunder god asked.

"A military man. He's been hounding Bruce," Steve answered. He'd read Bruce's file. "So General Ross has exposed Banner as the Hulk's alter ego?" Steve asked Tony.

"Why is this a danger?" Thor asked.

He and Cap were both attentive. They didn't understand, but they trusted that Tony did and, wow, trust!

"Easier to show you," Tony answered.

He pulled a StarkPad out of the food box and showed them the video.

Thor's face darkened in rage. "This is the basest treachery!"

"Banner won't be safe anywhere," Steve said.

"You win the prize, Einstein. I might have been able to put a stop to it but I was, you know, slightly unconscious. And SHIELD seems to be a little busy, for some reason, so — damage control. We're going to show the public how cute and cuddly Dr. Bruce Banner is. I mean, look at him!"

Bruce was helping with the cleanup in every way he could that didn't involve big green muscles. At the moment, he was bandaging a wound on the hand of a big, sweaty workman.

"I've seen scenes that were more cuddly," Thor said in amusement.

Tony regarded Bruce in exasperation. "We need cute, Banner, not macho!" he muttered to himself.

"What can we do to help?" Steve asked Tony.

"We need to fight PR with PR," Tony replied. "We need to show the world what a sweetheart Bruce Banner is. Some nice fluffy rescue pics would be perfect."

"Excuse me, Mr. Iron Man," a young voice said from somewhere around Tony's waist. A sandy-haired boy stood there, about 9 but small for his age.

Tony blinked at the youthful apparition. "Where did you come from?"

"I live here," the boy said. "Two blocks over, above the dry cleaner."

Tony was flabbergasted to be standing in a war zone with a kid. For once, the billionaire couldn't think of anything to say. Fortunately, he had backup.

"Can we help you, son?" Cap asked. "What's your name?"

"Adam. Please, I need to rescue Fluffy."

"Fluffy?" Tony asked, suddenly alert. He'd asked for fluffy.

"My dog, sir. He was at the groomer's when the aliens attacked. Mom had to run and leave Fluffy behind. He'll be scared and hungry," Adam pleaded.

"Where is your mother?" Thor asked kindly. "Does she know you are here?"

"She got hurt," the boy said. "She's in the hospital. She'll be OK, but she can't come." The boy was determined. "It's up to me. Fluffy is depending on me."

"I think we understand and we might be able to help," Tony said. "Just one question. How fluffy is your dog?"

**To be continued**


	3. Stay Here Where It's Safe

**Chapter 3: Stay Here Where It's Safe**

Tony persuaded Steve and Thor to not tell Bruce about Ross. He wasn't worried about Bruce hulking out but about him running.

Thor looked at Cap for guidance. He didn't like lying to a comrade, but he thought Midgardians knew each other better than he did.

Chewing his sandwich, Steve considered Tony's words. Swallowing, he agreed.

"He's coming," Steve warned, seeing Bruce pack up his medical kit. "What's your play, Stark?"

"We've got to see a man about a dog," Tony answered.

* * *

Tony assigned Steve to stick with Bruce.

"People trust you. Maybe some of that trust will wear off on Bruce."

"Don't they trust you?"

"They trust my tech," Tony answered. "Me, not so much. Anyway, you help Banner find the dog and I'll handle the media."

"What about me?" Thor asked.

"Back to the heavy lifting, big guy. You won't be lying to Bruce if you don't talk to him. Drinks later," Tony promised.

"Very well, but if your plans go awry, know you can count on me to protect our friend, whatever color he is." Thor saluted the approaching scientist, then launched himself toward a pile of Chitauri corpses on the other side of the street.

* * *

Thoroughly wiping his hands with a sanitizing cloth, Bruce approached the group of Avengers and took the sandwich Tony offered.

"Who's your friend?" he asked, gesturing at Adam, while he ate quickly in neat, precise bites.

"This is Adam. His dog Fluffy is trapped in the groomer's shop." Tony pointed toward where a blue and gold Gracie's Groomers sign lay tilted against a pile of rubble that blocked three storefronts.

"Can you help me get Fluffy out, sir?" the boy asked, using his big brown eyes to good effect.

Adam didn't know why Mr. Stark wanted him to make Dr. Banner look good, but he'd do anything to save Fluffy.

Wiping his hands, Bruce studied the shops indicated. The facades were smashed, but many of the ground floor shops were surprisingly undamaged inside, like the shawarma shop.

"I'll try," he told the boy. "But try not to get your hopes up," he said kindly. "We don't know how much damage occurred."

"Yes sir," Adam said quietly.

Cap jogged back from the shops under discussion.

"I can hear barking inside," the Super Soldier reported, making Adam's face brighten. "I think you can get in if I remove a few chunks of debris."

Bruce deposited his trash in the proper receptacle. "Let's go."

Adam started to follow the two Avengers, but Bruce gripped his shoulder. "No, you stay here where it's safe."

* * *

Steve was carefully shifting rubble away from the three blocked storefronts. He picked up the fallen groomer's sign and carried it to a dump truck of debris. This opened a path for Bruce to enter one of the shops. He knew it was the wrong one immediately, but he diligently searched the dry cleaner's to make sure no one was inside living or dead.

Fortunately, it seemed everyone in this section had a chance to escape.

He left the dry cleaner's and found Cap working on a pile of loose rubble. He was firing hook shots into the back of the dump truck using pieces of concrete the size of basketballs.

"Nice form," Bruce commented. He explained he hadn't found anyone in the dry cleaner's.

Steve said he's checked the one on the left and found an empty insurance office. "So the groomer's must be the center one. Can you hear the dog?"

Thanks to his enhanced hearing. Cap knew darn well where the dog was, but Tony wanted this to be Bruce's rescue.

Now that he was standing close, Bruce also could hear the dog yipping inside.

"The door's hopeless," Steve said. "But I think you can get in through the window."

He used the shield to clear the remaining shards of glass, then hoisted a fallen display case to let Bruce get past it.

The scientist climbed in and followed the yipping to a wire cage containing one small bundle of white curls. The Maltese puppy lived up to his name.

"Hello, Fluffy," Bruce said, as he unlatched the cage door.

The puppy wagged his whole body. Black button eyes looked trustingly at the stranger.

There was a leash on top of the cage with a collar. Bruce put those on the small dog before lifting him out.

"Come on, you've got a friend waiting for you," Bruce told the dog.

* * *

Bruce called to Steve that he'd found the dog.

"Great, give me a second and I'll clear the way for you."

Steve signaled to Tony, who rounded up the camera crew. "Come on, kids. You're going to want to see this. We have a rescue in progress."

The camera was rolling in time to see Cap lift the display case aside to let Bruce climb out, cradling the cute little dog in his arms,

It was golden, Tony thought with a satisfied smirk.

When Bruce straightened up, the puppy licked his face, making the scientist laugh.

When he saw his dog, Adam couldn't restrain himself any longer. "Fluffy!" he yelled and ran to Bruce. The scientist dropped to one knee to hand over the excited pup, who wriggled in excitement and licked whichever face he could reach.

Smiling, Cap stepped away to give Bruce the moment.

It was golden, Tony thought — then shouts from down the street interrupted.

* * *

The cleanup crew had already removed the fallen space whale from the train station, but getting one off the top of a skyscraper took more planning. Two blocks from where the Avengers were working, two towering cranes had been rigged to the creature. They began lifting in unison. But as they swung the creature over the cleared street, acid began to ooze from the many punctures in the leviathan's skin. The slings began to fizz and dissolve.

Shouts of alarm warned the people below who scattered. The crane operators hastened to position the creature in a safe zone before the slings snapped and the carcass dropped with a crash.

The ground shook from the fall, but everyone had scrambled clear. Iron Man and Thor flew over to make sure everyone was all right. Cap took two steps in that direction, then heard a crack from above him.

The façade of the building cracked all along the third floor and the slab of concrete began to slide toward Bruce and Adam who were kneeling beside the puppy.

With his enhanced speed and reflexes, Cap could have escaped the concrete avalanche, but it didn't even cross his mind. He leaped forward, and then it was too late to retreat. Not that he would have.

Steve knew that this time his shield wouldn't be enough, knew that the falling wall would squash him like a bug and he hoped like hell the serum couldn't put him back together after something like that.

He covered the others with his shield, but knew they really had only one hope for survival.

**To be continued, of course**


	4. Superhero

_A/N: I'm taking a trip to Catalina tomorrow, so I decided to post tonight. Here's the big finale. And see Captain America2 as soon as you can. Freaking awesome and inspiring (fanfic-wise)._

**Chapter 4: Superhero **

Cap futilely raised his shield to protect his companions from the urban avalanche. As he ducked beside the boy and puppy, he was jostled from behind. He heard the sound of ripping cloth, then Bruce's shout became the Hulk's roar of defiance.

* * *

The camera had swung from the cute puppy rescue to capture images of the falling leviathan. The crew had jogged into the middle of the street to for a better angle.

The sound of cracking concrete close at hand made the camera swing back in time to see Cap leap into the danger zone to futilely shelter the others.

And then Dr. Banner swelled and turned green, like a time-lapse film of a growing plant.

In an instant, the Hulk loomed over Cap and the boy. He roared defiance at the plummeting wall and grabbed it out of the air. He held it by the edge, as a man might hold a wooden plank.

Keeping his shield raised to deflect falling rocks, Cap looked up as the shadow of the concrete slab fell across him. It hovered above him like a very low ceiling supported by a few green fingers.

"Cap move," Hulk ordered.

Steve swept boy and dog into his arms beneath the shield and sprinted to a safe distance.

Hulk grunted satisfaction and let the slab drop with a contemptuous snort.

He stalked toward Steve. "Cap hurt?"

"I'm fine, thanks to you." In truth, Steve's back was bruised and battered by smaller pieces of debris, but it was so much less than he had feared.

"Boy OK?"

"You saved us! Thanks Mr. Hulk." Adam threw his arms around the Hulk's waist.

Bemused but not unpleased by the gratitude, Hulk patted the boy on his head and did the same for the dog.

Though the man looked different, Fluffy could tell by scent that he was the same person as the nice man who rescued him from the cage. The puppy happily licked Hulk's finger.

Hulk smiled – then his eyes rolled up and he began to shrink and change color.

Cap instantly moved to protect his friend.

* * *

Iron Man rocketed back, too late to help but relieved to see everyone was all right. He dropped beside the camera crew.

"You got that, right?" he almost begged.

"Every second," the cameraman replied, dazed by visions of Pulitzers dancing in his head.

"If your station doesn't want to run it, I will pay to run it as a commercial," Tony promised.

"Oh, they'll run it," the reporter promised.

"Tony." Cap's commanding tone snagged the billionaire's attention.

"What do you need, captain?" Tony asked breezily.

"Pants."

Tony realized Cap had positioned himself and his shield strategically between the camera and half-conscious Bruce who was only half-wearing the remains of his stretched out clothing.

"Pants. Right." Tony launched toward the top floor of the "A" Tower. "On it."

* * *

That night, after a full afternoon of cleanup, Tony handed out drinks as promised to a Super Soldier, a thunder god and two anonymous SHIELD agents who had shown up with a bottle of Russian vodka and a bucket of nearly toxic Buffalo chicken wings. Thor had a huge souvenir beer stein full of beer while everyone else was happy with normal glasses of beer and wine (or shots of vodka).

Bruce declined alcohol, but accepted iced tea from Pepper and hungrily gnawed on the wings that made Pepper's eyes water from a foot away.

"So you're saying that Ross exposed me as a monster," Bruce said anxiously.

"But then we showed the 'monster' has a human side," Tony said with satisfaction.

"We?" Clint asked, raising one eyebrow ironically.

"Jarvis and me," Tony answered. "We are flooding the Internet with feel-good images as we speak." He flopped on the couch with a wince and a groan. "This is not what I planned when I said take a day," he complained. "I'm stiffer than I was this morning."

"Another soak in the hot tub would be good," Clint hinted.

"Ever take a communal soak in a hot tub, Cap?" Tony asked with a salacious grin Steve recognized from his father.

"Been in a hot spring in Baden Baden, but not in mixed company," Steve answered warily.

"Mixed company's the best kind," Clint assured him, which earned him a dope slap from Natasha.

"Don't worry, Steve, the wearing of swimsuits will be strictly enforced," Pepper said, giving Tony a severe look. Pepper and Natasha exchanged a nod of accord.

"Strictly enforced," Natasha emphasized, twirling a knife between her fingers.

"Spoilsports," Tony muttered.

* * *

Swimsuits were distributed from the collection of clothes kept for guests. Natasha and Pepper found the most sedate suits available, one-piece versions with modest necklines. Natasha's even had a little skirt. They weren't too far off the common ladies swimsuit of the 1940s, but Steve, being a gentleman, kept his eyes firmly on their faces. Clint and Tony rolled their eyes, but the ladies found it refreshing.

However, they couldn't keep their eyes of Steve's torso. It was covered in dark bruises from falling rocks — bruises that were visibly changing colors and fading while they watched.

"That's from when the wall fell?" Bruce asked. He looked guilty, as if his alter ego should have caught every pebble. Steve assured him the bruises would be gone by morning.

"That's disturbing," Tony said, watching the colors change.

"I'm jealous," Clint announced. His back was just as black and blue, but he would have to put up with it for far longer.

"Get in the water, so we don't have to see any more," Tony suggested.

Both Steve and Clint were quick to do so. Bruises called for ice, but sore muscles demanded hot water. Everyone was glad to soak quietly for a bit, eating sandwiches from platters placed around the spa and sipping cool drinks.

Steve and the spies shared memories of Baden Baden, while Pepper and Tony chimed in with their favorite spa in the south of France. Thor told about the royal hot springs in Asgard and Bruce described a thermal mud pool that had been a lifesaver in South America.

Finally, Tony said, "How are we doing, J? Is the rehabilitation of Dr. Bruce Banner complete?"

"800,568 views on YouTube," the AI reported. "507,928 likes on Facebook — half of those are for the photograph of the puppy licking Hulk, a quarter for the puppy licking Dr. Banner and most of the rest are for the photo of Captain America standing in front of Dr. Banner after he changed back. I regret that most of those have deplorably salacious comments."

"About Cap's tight pants or Bruce's no pants?" Tony asked curiously.

"Both, sir."

Steve and Bruce both slapped their faces to hide their embarrassment.

"I'll have to read those later," Tony decided. "What else have we got?"

"The Pinterest gallery is generating much interest and the Twitter photos are being retweeted at such a rate that even I am hard pressed to keep track. Overall, the response is 90 percent favorable. Dr. Banner is trending, sir."

Thor tilted his head closer to Steve's. "The All Speak is failing me. I understand these words, but the sentences have no meaning. What do bird calls have to do with Banner?"

"You're asking the wrong guy," Steve replied. "But I'm pretty sure they're not talking about carrier pigeons."

The two men looked at the two spies.

Clint threw a frantic look at Natasha.

"Sorry, I don't speak English," she said in Russian and slugged back a shot of vodka before pouring another to sip.

Thor chuckled at her evasion. Clint and Steve rolled their eyes. That was one of the foreign phrases Steve had learned during the war.

Natasha gave Clint a firm glare. He needed to take his mind off Loki. Explaining Stark to Thor and Steve was a good start.

Clint sighed. "OK, social media in 25 words or less," the archer agreed. (He almost said Social Media for Dummies, but the two blonds wouldn't get the reference and he'd hate to offend them when he didn't have his bow handy.)

"All this falls under the term 'social media,' which is a way people communicate via computers."

"Why do many?" Steve asked.

"Different things appeal to different people," Clint explained. He racked his brain to find a comparison the guys would understand. "Like radio stations or groups of entertainers. Some people like comedy, some like drama. On the Internet, some people like to look at photos — Pinterest is mostly photo galleries. YouTube is movies. Twitter uses brief messages with maybe a photo attached. Facebook is more like a bulletin board, you put up a comment or photo and your friends stick notes beside it."

"Don't tell me you made Hulk a Facebook page," Bruce groaned

"OK, I won't tell you," Tony said cheerfully. "But more than a quarter million people have friended him so far and at least 30 have added that he — you — saved their lives during the battle."

Clint continued, "Anyway, Tony and Jarvis ..."

"Mostly Jarvis," Pepper put in.

"... are sending out information to every site they can think of and other people are picking it up and passing it along. So millions of people have seen what a good guy Banner is."

"Whatever color his skin is," Thor agreed.

"You forgot LinkedIn," Pepper said in amusement, looking up from her personal StarkPad.

"LinkedIn?" Bruce protested. "That's for business networking. People list their accomplishments and their skills," he told Steve and Thor.

"That's right," Pepper agreed. She showed Bruce her screen. Dr. Bruce Banner's almost forgotten LinkedIn page had been updated with an image of Hulk saving Cap and the kid with the message, New skill: Superhero.

**The End**


End file.
